a bit about me –
for the past year or so, i have been struggling with my health in ways that are different to before. experiencing irregular, extremely heavy and immensely painful periods, hair loss and cystic acne, i knew something was wrong and needed to change.
so i went down the rabbit hole that is health and wellness – a productive hole until it becomes unproductive.
i switched up my lifestyle and diet, in all the ways that the internet tells you to, and whilst i still believe in the merit of some of those things to help me heal, i want to point out that the health and wellness industry is truly a rabbit hole; one which i believe i fell down and am in the process of climbing out.
it’s hard to pick, once you’ve fallen in, because what’s wrong with looking after yourself? what’s wrong with wanting to be healthy?
no longer was i obsessed with quantity – how much exercise i did or how little i ate, but i became obsessed with quality – the quality of my food, exercise that i did, and quite honestly, the quality of everything that went into my day, right down to the way that i breathed.
and i found myself not being able to bend. preferences became rules. and when i broke them, i broke down in anxiety. all other aspects of my life suffered – relationships, family, uni, career –
what’s healthy about that?
i lost sight of all the foundations i had built for myself – the ability to listen to my body (instead of what the health and wellness industry was selling me) and to be intuitive throughout my day. i was no longer looking at the menu, saying, what looks good? but i began looking at it like some jigsaw puzzle where i had to pick the right piece next.
whilst i still believe in the ability of health and wellness to help heal the current issues that i am experiencing, i too recognise its ability to actually hinder my progress; to be a source of the problem and not a solution to it.
if what you are doing is stressful for you; taking up a significant amount of time for something that should be a mere compliment to and not the entire part of your day; if it is impeding on any other part of your life, then it is not healthy.
– bella
the skinny elephant 